how do they ever get anywhere?

The kids are home safe and sound and on to their next trips. I hope these trips are much better than the one we all took Friday home St. Louis.

On Friday Monte, Whitney, Lucy and I met Laef and Allison at 10:40 PM at the East Terminal. We hugged and kissed and laughed as we retrieved bags. We found the car right away in the parking garage and looking back that should have been a clue. We took off with Whitney in the co-pilots’s seat and me in the backseat. I should have reminded Whitney that it takes two of us to drive anywhere and that she would have to work to ride in the shotgun seat, but I was just happy to have my babies with me.

We were all talking at once and no one was paying any attention to where we were or where we were headed. We didn’t have Mr. Beep, (our GPS) on because St. Louis isn’t downloaded. Yes, I know the new ones have all the maps already loaded on them. Ours is old.

Monte saw a sign for I-70 and took it. Whitney didn't know she should check to see if it was I-70 East or West. In the first lull in our conversation, I looked out the window and said, "I’ve never seen that building before." Monte said, "It’s just dark out." And so we drove on.

In another couple of miles we come upon a red wall of tail lights. And for the next 45 minutes it was stop and go traffic. Which Monte hates and grumbles about anytime he encounters it. It was a hassle but we were all together and anytime we are all together I’m pretty content with whatever is going on around us and besides I’m not in the co-pilot seat. We continue on our slow way with Monte grumbling about traffic and Laef quipping that he feels like he’s at home on the 405. Laef checks for road conditions on his blackberry and informs us "There’s been an accident on 70 East and it’s closed." We still don't put two and two together. Someone remarks that it must be a bad wreck because the people on 70 West, which we think we are on, are really slowing down to look.

And so we creep on. Finally we come to where the road is closed and exit onto a side road. Once we are off the interstate, Monte looks at the compass on the rearview mirror and notices that we are headed east. East will take us downtown. We don’t want to go downtown. Of course, he doesn’t think we’ve been on 70 East because he knows we have to go west to get home and so the signs must be wrong. Or they weren’t there. Or who knows what he thinks when he gets behind the wheel.

So we all start to pay attention and find I-70 west and finally head home. The good thing is because of the wreck we have only gone 4 miles in 45 minutes and it doesn’t take long to regain our lost miles. But our 2 ½ hour trip is now a 4 hour trip.

Laef and Whitney are amazed that we ever manage to get anywhere. Monte and I are thinking it’s no big deal. We spend about a fourth of our time on the road lost or wondering if we are lost even when we have the GPS on. And we’re also thinking at least we didn’t have 30 feet of fifth wheel behind us.

Christmas Presents for All

This year I have been slow about getting ready for Christmas. I was in a funk and all of a sudden it was December 12 and nothing was done. But my life-long procrastination survival mode kicked and I’ve been going full blast. Menus have been made and cards have been written and sent. Gifts have been made and shopping trips were planned. Then the weather started being winter like and I was afraid there would only be checks under the tree.

I know some of you are thinking that money is the answer what with not knowing sizes or what the kids already have. But I hate to do that. I like to open presents and to watch the kids open presents. And I like a lot of presents. And I like surprises. And I don’t like to admit that I don’t know the kids well enough anymore to know what they have or want.

But I’ve gotten in gear and now I’m pretty satisfied with the present situation. Today I took a count and things are a bit lopsided. Whitney is always easy to buy for and I have to stop when I greach the limit Monte sets. And she will be happy to hear this year is no different.

Laef is harder to buy for. He never gives hints until December 22. At 6'6" it’s hard to run out and buy him a shirt or jeans. And as a male, many of the things he wants are expensive and I hate for him to just have one or two things under the tree. Then I also have to think about how he’s going to get his presents back to California. But his count is pretty good.

Now poor Allison’s count is not so good. But I have a couple of excuses, I mean, reasons. The biggest reason is our relationship is new and I’m trying for favorite mother-in-law (FMIL) status, and so I’ve been second guessing everything I buy for her. I pick up something and carry it around the store. I wonder will she like it? Will it fit? Is it too Midwest? And then I put it back just before I head to check out. Poor Allison. But I have a tactic I’m going to employ when she opens her two presents. I’m going to tell her that I was concerned about how she was to get all her presents home and I was just thinking of her when I wrapped up the cold hard cash. I’m counting on her being swayed by my consideration so I can hold on to my FMIL rank.

This FMIL status may be much harder to attain than I think.